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David Cameron Still Believes Aston Villa United Can Win World Cup

David Cameron has this morning publicly reaffirmed his support for ‘The Aston Villa United’ at this years World Cup, claiming they could easily still win the contest. Speaking at an interview on ITV’s Good Morning Britain, the former Prime Minister revealed:

“I know it’s terrible news about the footballs yesterday, but as a country we have to believe the Aston Villa United can win the current World Championships. It’s still mathematically possible, and until it’s not we shouldn’t give up. We’re up against tough opposition in the form of the green team, but we can still go on and do it for England.”

When asked to elucidate his baffling explanation of the sporting tournament that has gripped the nation this summer, Mr. Cameron went on:

“What gets me is how the opposition team is always on side as well as off side, but the umpire never seems to wave for it during play. That doesn’t matter to the old Villa Athletic though, we always score more points than anyone else, especially if it goes to a tie break.”

When it was pointed out to David Cameron that he appeared to be misunderstanding several key concepts of Association Football, as well as the premise of the World Cup, he appeared flustered and tried to change the subject. A spokesman for the former Prime Minister later sought to explain the situation by saying that Mr. Cameron had been thinking of his pet cat at the time of the interview, and had become confused as a result.

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